Not long ago, a mom who listened to our "Consequences with Empathy" CD shared the following story with me.

She recently went shopping with her 15-year-old son to buy jeans, but the store they went to didn’t have them in his size. She had to say "no" when he suggested buying them in a smaller size.

As she looked at all the jeans surrounding them, she was about to say, "These other jeans look just as good. Can’t you just pick something out?" Then she remembered a similar scenario from the "Consequences with Empathy" CD, and decided to give empathy a try.

"You are really disappointed they don’t have those jeans in your size." This simple statement made all the difference in the world! His reaction was, in her words, "disarming." She could tell he felt understood. His resentment lifted and the rest of their shopping experience was actually pleasant.

In the past, she said, a situation like this would have escalated out of control as both of them dug in their heels. By taking a moment to pause, do some reflective listening, and walk in his shoes, the conflict was avoided.

When you’re struggling to be empathetic, it helps to remember that Jesus chose to come to earth and literally walk in our shoes. Hebrews 4:15 says, "For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are-yet was without sin."

Michelle Groff

Principles into Practice